Welcome to the first round of the 2010 Cubs of Yore Battle Royale.  Today we get things started with matchups in the Jose Cardenal Region.  2009 champion Glenallen Hill will begin his run for a second title against 8th seeded newcomer Doug Glanville.  Also squaring off is Rich Harden versus 90s infielding whiz Rey Sanchez, Mike Bielecki takes on fellow former Cub pitcher Glendon Rusch, and Mark Grudzielanek will battle it out against Doug Dascenzo.

This should be an exciting group of matches here.  Just like last year, I will outline each matchup, giving the readers a little background about each player. Once you've finished reading, you are then encouraged to vote for your favorite player to win the battle in the polls located in the right sidebar.

The polls will run until Thursday afternoon-ish where they will then be closed and the winners announced.


JOSE CARDENAL REGION, ROUND 1

• Hails from the Land of Badass Motherfuckers.
• Played with the Cubs for 5 years.
• HE DON'T TAKE NO SHIT FROM NOBODY.
• Hit a HR onto a 5-story apartment complex outside Wrigley Field in 2001.
• Was named in the Mitchell Report. It remains his most famous mention in anything ever.
• Not very good on defense; nicknamed "The Juggler" for his defensive ineptitude. Just don't call him that to his face.

DOUG GLANVILLE FAST FACTS*

• Hails from New Jersey.
• Played with the Cubs from 1996-1997 and again in 2003.
• Was traded after the 1997 season to the Phillies in exchange for Mickey Morandini.
• Attended University of Pennsylvania.
• Now writes guest columns for the New York Times.
• Wrote this gem about Mark McGwire's PED use.
• Also works as a baseball analyst for ESPN.  If he's smart he'll eventually jump ship for MLB Network.

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• Hails from Canada.  Often called the Michael J. Fox of baseball.
• Pitched for the Cubs from 2008 to 2009
• Led team last season in upside potential.
• Pitching more than 7 innings will cause him to turn into a gremlin.
• Traded to the Cubs for Thunder Matt Murton, among others.

REY SANCHEZ FAST FACTS*

• Hails from Puerto Rico.
• Played with Cubs for 7 years.
• Has played for 1/3 of MLB teams.
• One of the great practitioners of the sacrifice bunt.
• THE definition of a bench player.
• Can play all the infield positions.
• Cannot play the banjo, despite years of lessons.

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MARK GRUDZIELANEK FAST FACTS*

• Batted .312 over two seasons with the Cubs.
• Received a NL MVP vote in 2003.
• 1987 Regional Skee-Ball champion.
• Acquired by the Cubs along with Eric Karros in exchange for Todd Hundley and Chad Hermansen.  HAHA! (Points and laughs at the Dodgers)
• Most misspelled name in Cubs history.  Jeff Samardzija may have been misspelled more but who gives a shit?
• Favorite food is ham and cheese Hot Pockets.

 DOUG DASCENZO FAST FACTS*

• Hails from Western Pennsylvania.
• Played with Cubs for 5 years.
• At 5' 8", pioneered the "small scrappy fan favorite" niche on the Cubs that everyone seems to love. Mike Fontenot, Ryan Theriot and Sam Fuld owe him a debt of gratitude.
• Has a career ERA of 0.00 in 5 innings pitched with 2 strikeouts and 2 walks. Certainly much better than the 3.1 innings Samardzija threw so far this season.
• Once played in 241 consecutive games without committing an error, a NL record at the time.
• Shares the same birthday as.... Mark Grudzielanek.

*Some of the Fast Facts may not be true.