Burning Cubs Question: Volume 4
4/28/2010 | Posted by
T.R.
In this popular, semi-monthly segment, we examine questions in regards to the Cubs that are literally burning in people's brains. Have no fear...we're here to provide the bucket of water to douse that fire, although I fear your burns may prove to be fatal anyway.
This week's question comes from Aaron in St. Louis:
I can't help but notice that there is something different about Randy Wells, compared to many of the big name starting pitchers in baseball, such as Josh Beckett and A.J. Burnett. Maybe it's his windup, or his presence on the mound? Is it his out pitch? Anyway, I'm not quite sure what it is, and I was wondering if anyone else felt the same way when they watch Wells pitch?
First off, let's not get ahead of ourselves. A.J. Burnett is by no means a "big name" pitcher. He's just a regular name that happens to play in New York.
Your question had us perplexed for a while, Aaron. Unfortunately Randy was unreachable during the team's road trip to New York, but we sat in the EOC War Room and broke down tape of his starts this season. We thought we had it nailed right away when we realized that Wells never uses the rosin bag. That theory was later shot down though, as you clearly see him go to it in the fourth inning of his second start, and then multiple times afterward. He showed consistent command and control of his pitches, and was surprisingly efficient when falling behind in the count. While everything seemed ordinary, something was still a bit peculiar...and then we finally nailed it.
Aaron, what you're seeing, or actually not seeing in the case of Randy Wells, is an oversized, obnoxious hemp necklace. At no point this season has Randy donned this abortion of a fashion statement that so many young pitchers, such as Josh Beckett, wear as if it were a badge of honor. The photos below lend a little insight. When you watch Randy Wells pitch, what you are not seeing is a hippy-dippy, designer piece of string flopping around like a prostitute's vagina when a 30 mile per hour gust comes in off Lake Michigan. This is not just our opinion, either. Look at the stats:
Randy Wells: 2.49 ERA through 25.1 innings, 5 BB, 19 K
Josh Beckett: 7.22 ERA through 28.2 innings, 13(!) BB, 20 K
Small sample size? Sure, but it's not rocket science. How can one pitch effectively, let alone be taken seriously at their profession, when they have an ass load of puka shells hanging off their neck? Would Don Draper walk into his place of business wearing that nonsense? No, they'd call him a queer and run his prissy ass right out of town.
Maybe we're old fashioned here at EOC, but we firmly believe that America needs more outstanding young men shapingour nation's future baseball's future, sans female or hippy clothing accessories. We commend Randy Wells for his conservative and status quo convictions.
This week's question comes from Aaron in St. Louis:
I can't help but notice that there is something different about Randy Wells, compared to many of the big name starting pitchers in baseball, such as Josh Beckett and A.J. Burnett. Maybe it's his windup, or his presence on the mound? Is it his out pitch? Anyway, I'm not quite sure what it is, and I was wondering if anyone else felt the same way when they watch Wells pitch?
First off, let's not get ahead of ourselves. A.J. Burnett is by no means a "big name" pitcher. He's just a regular name that happens to play in New York.
Your question had us perplexed for a while, Aaron. Unfortunately Randy was unreachable during the team's road trip to New York, but we sat in the EOC War Room and broke down tape of his starts this season. We thought we had it nailed right away when we realized that Wells never uses the rosin bag. That theory was later shot down though, as you clearly see him go to it in the fourth inning of his second start, and then multiple times afterward. He showed consistent command and control of his pitches, and was surprisingly efficient when falling behind in the count. While everything seemed ordinary, something was still a bit peculiar...and then we finally nailed it.
Aaron, what you're seeing, or actually not seeing in the case of Randy Wells, is an oversized, obnoxious hemp necklace. At no point this season has Randy donned this abortion of a fashion statement that so many young pitchers, such as Josh Beckett, wear as if it were a badge of honor. The photos below lend a little insight. When you watch Randy Wells pitch, what you are not seeing is a hippy-dippy, designer piece of string flopping around like a prostitute's vagina when a 30 mile per hour gust comes in off Lake Michigan. This is not just our opinion, either. Look at the stats:
Randy Wells: 2.49 ERA through 25.1 innings, 5 BB, 19 K
Josh Beckett: 7.22 ERA through 28.2 innings, 13(!) BB, 20 K
Small sample size? Sure, but it's not rocket science. How can one pitch effectively, let alone be taken seriously at their profession, when they have an ass load of puka shells hanging off their neck? Would Don Draper walk into his place of business wearing that nonsense? No, they'd call him a queer and run his prissy ass right out of town.
Maybe we're old fashioned here at EOC, but we firmly believe that America needs more outstanding young men shaping
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