Milwaukee Brewers

2009: 80-82 (3rd)

So Long: OF Mike Cameron, OF Frank Catalanotto, SS J.J. Hardy, C Jason Kendall, P Braden Looper, 2B Felipe Lopez, P Seth McClung, OF Corey Patterson, C Mike Rivera, P David Weathers

Welcome: P Doug Davis, OF Jim Edmonds, OF Carlos Gomez, P LaTroy Hawkins, P Scott Schoeneweis, P Randy Wolf, C Gregg Zaun

Projected Starting Lineup
1. Rickie Weeks, 2B
2. Alcides Escobar, SS
3. Ryan Braun, LF
4. Prince Fielder, 1B
5. Corey Hart, RF
6. Casey McGehee, 3B
7. Gregg Zaun, C
8. Carlos Gomez, CF

Rotation - Yovani Gallardo, Randy Wolf, Dave Bush, Doug Davis, Jeff Suppan
Setup - LaTroy Hawkins, Todd Coffey
Closer - Trevor Hoffman

Aside from Cecil's son and Ryan Braun (pictured right), how is this lineup as scary as the pundits are making it out to be? Corey Hart played so poorly that even he was taken aback at winning his arbitration case. Rickie Weeks should have enough time this Spring to settle back in after wrist surgery early last season. Alcides Escobar is a young stolen base threat who will be their shortstop and potential leadoff man of the future, but it's his sophomore year. The league will adjust to him, and Milwaukee must hope that his plate discipline doesn't dip.

After these four, there are a good number of holes and risks in the lineup. Hart needs to pick up some slack, and Twins castoff Carlos Gomez needs drastically improve that .229 BA from last year, lest he be replaced by the ghost of Jim Edmonds. Retread Casey McGehee at third base? A film critic and part time ballplayer at catcher? There are plenty of holes in this order, and as we all know, prodigious home runs cannot cure all ails.

Oh, but it's not all about the hitting, they have plenty of pitching issues to go around. Yovani Gallardo is a horse, but after him, it's like you walked into an Elk's Lodge. Dave Bush? Doug Davis? Jeff Suppan and his seven wins from last year is the highest paid player on the team? Randy Wolf's performance over the last two years pitching in Petco and Dodger Stadium cannot be taken seriously. Much respect to Trevor Hoffman, but realistically, he's due to take a step back this season.

PRESEASON AWARDS

If this team were a disease/ailment it would be: impotency. This Brew Crew will shoot their load early and often with Fielder and Braun paying no mind to the outfield fences. However, the rotation and long relief will not support that offensive production, causing this team to shoot blanks more often than not.

Oil of Olay Spokesperson of the Year Award: Ryan Braun. OMG, does he roll out of bed this beautiful?!?! It must be so hard to be that productive and look that metrosexual. He must spend just as much time in front of the mirror as he does the batting cage.

The Steve Miller Band 'Take the Money and Run' Award: Jeff Suppan. With an ERA north of 5.00 and nearly as many walks as strikeouts, he should give back the $12.5 million he earned in 2009. At 35 years of age, they are dumping money into a black hole. Sucks for Brewers fans!